Too close to home
Aug. 22nd, 2009 02:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rawneeI started reading New Moon again last night. Of all the books, I can't decide if this is the worst one. Not because I don't like the story, far from it, I love them all. This one just hits a raw nerve now and then.
When Edward leaves Bella and says it will be as if he never existed, I remember Paul saying after he left, how he wished he could make all the bad memories go away and I would just forget about him. I know how Bella felt when she said she just wanted to hear his voice! The pages from when he left having nothing more than the month written on them were the same months that Paul was away from home. When Bella starts to pull out of her misery, it was in January...that was around the time Paul came home and my life picked up again.
I know it all sounds very 'amateur dramatics' and that's where the similarities end but most of us have known the pain of lost love and some never get that back again; others move on and realise it was a crush, a pleasant moment in time but not the real thing. I can honestly say that I have never, in my whole life, felt as helpless and lonely as I did then. It was only 6 months out of my life but I never want to feel that way again.
As much as Paul's a pain in the arse sometimes, he would do anything for me and give me anything I asked for if he could and I genuinely do love him. It's not been the perfect relationship by any stretch of the imagination but who does have a perfect relationship?
Married life didn't start off terribly well with the accident and it's been hard ever since, but we're getting by. We've realised that we're useless when we're not together.
When Edward leaves Bella and says it will be as if he never existed, I remember Paul saying after he left, how he wished he could make all the bad memories go away and I would just forget about him. I know how Bella felt when she said she just wanted to hear his voice! The pages from when he left having nothing more than the month written on them were the same months that Paul was away from home. When Bella starts to pull out of her misery, it was in January...that was around the time Paul came home and my life picked up again.
I know it all sounds very 'amateur dramatics' and that's where the similarities end but most of us have known the pain of lost love and some never get that back again; others move on and realise it was a crush, a pleasant moment in time but not the real thing. I can honestly say that I have never, in my whole life, felt as helpless and lonely as I did then. It was only 6 months out of my life but I never want to feel that way again.
As much as Paul's a pain in the arse sometimes, he would do anything for me and give me anything I asked for if he could and I genuinely do love him. It's not been the perfect relationship by any stretch of the imagination but who does have a perfect relationship?
Married life didn't start off terribly well with the accident and it's been hard ever since, but we're getting by. We've realised that we're useless when we're not together.
